sheepsJanuary to March


03/30/2022 | Happy birfday to me! And what a surprisingly nice birthday it's been. Despite my lack of analog journalling this year, I'd like to make sure I get around to it at some point. I had to work my normal 10-hour today, but my coworkers decorated my desk and made me wear a goofy hat and got me some cute gifts, which was so sweet of them. ;o; My manager also shares my birthday, and she bought lunch for everyone which was really nice. (and brought homemade macaroni salad??? i need to bother her for the recipe.)

My partner and I are talking about trying to take a small trip with some of the birthday money that I got too. We just need to get out of the house and have some time away from everyone up here. Not to mention we haven't travelled anywhere for fun (just family stuff) since... I think fall 2019? It may have been his birthday that year when we drove down to Portland, geez! Regardless, it's time to go somewhere, even if we just hole up in a cold campground for a night, lol.

My mom also managed to send a couple packages my way which was so sweet of her. It almost made me cry tbh. I've been so homesick, and between the literal pandemic and my worsening social anxiety, going home has felt so close to impossible lately. I know I will make it happen soon, but man, brain is still kicking my butt in so many ways. I'm just trying to remember to be gentle but push where and when I can. It's all we can do some days, and that's okay. Happy birthday world! I hope you all have a happy April ahead.

03/26/2022 | It's been so funny to realize that this is the happiest I've been with existing online in a very long time. I mean probably like 2018 at least? Between the changing face of how different social media platforms are used and then my own shushing of myself due to some irl issues, I had just kind of given up on everything except for tumblr, and only then, it was mostly because tumblr was still cuztomizable and had active communities for my interests. I'm happy to come back to coding and feeling like I can create even if my art skills aren't super wonderful. I'm happy to feel like I'm building another home online for myself. And while I know I don't necessarily comment on people's guestbooks/cboxes and such, it's nice to feel the sense of community over here on neocities. Thank you all for being so lovely and welcoming.

03/04/2022 | Long time no see, friends! Brain was being a little finicky there, but there's more sunshine and buds are sprouting on the trees and my neighbor's daffodils are blooming and the frogs are singing at night and the birds are migrating through for the season so peace has been restored. (or at least some brain stability to handle life a little better because world events are in a worse state now than they were when i was last here. >.>;;;)

after diving into making this site at a weird sprint, it was nice to step away and interact with some of my other hobbies for a bit! my brain is a little cyclical like that, but i've been getting back to journalling and replaying knights of the old republic 2 and stretching myself a little thin among all of the pokemon stuff that has been coming out. i also have been in a wild musical mood after watching centaurworld and have been listening to that soundtrack and the different hadestown cast recordings and fucking encanto which will not get out of my brain?? and i've been doing a little more language practice again which is good too.

ALL THIS TO SAY, i have way too many hobbies, but it's nice to realize that i've actually been making time for them even if it may not look like much to other folks. it really helps my brain stay in check.

01/23/2022 | Be gentle with yourselves friends, I feel like we all might need it. Brain took a nosedive there because.... well, life right now, i'm sure you can all imagine what's going on, but it was nice to log in and do a couple little things today. like tending a little garden.

i want this piece of the web to kinda be my escape from how not great things are, but it's hard to keep up with it when things get overwhelming and i have a hard time having the energy/motivation to create when that happens. on the bright side, my healthcare for my new job kicked in! so i can finally get some help in those arenas which is long overdue. i'm gonna take them one at at time so i don't further overwhelm myself as i all too often do, lol.

01/09/2022 | I hope the new year is treating you well, dear web explorer! Things have been... difficult at my end. Perhaps frustrating or upsetting would be more accurate? Another wave of the pandemic is hitting my area pretty hard, and while I am vaccinated, I'm still concerned for people's collective safety. Be careful out there folks, and most of all be kind to one another.

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